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Thread: Finally I've found you!

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2013
    Location
    PA "Dutch Country"
    Replies
    21
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    3

    Default Finally I've found you!

    Hi all! I've been looking for a place where a "no matter what!" WWer can feel at home.

    I came to WW on April 23, immediately started following the program, and haven't eaten an unplanned bite for 160 days.

    I'm finding that this is a rarity both in my local WW meetings and on their website. In fact, "stick to it no matter what" is a phrase which guarantees a storm of negativity from anyone who reads it.

    Not here, I hope.

    I'm a 50-something health care chaplain, living with lupus. In fact, before coming to WW, my doctor was actively considering hospice for me because my body was failing in a dozen different ways. I noticed, however, that I felt better when I ate less. When I mentioned this to my doctor, he recommended Weight Watchers, but also told me to not get my hopes up. It was probably the placebo effect or something psychosomatic, because no one believes that lupus is related to nutrition...

    ... I went into remission on Day Two, and went back to work as soon as I could convince my employer that I was now well. Summers have left me bedridden for almost 20 years, but this year, I was active every day, all summer. Now the doctor who was planning to refer me to hospice just wrote me a note to start an exercise program.

    Oh yeah, and I've lost over 30 pounds, too!

    So I am very committed to what works for me:

    - pre-planning every meal
    - weighing and measuring every bite
    - getting all my good health guidelines
    - not using weekly or activity points, because I feel better when I don't

    And this is apparently something that WW doesn't want to hear. Flexibility does NOT work for me. And my life is at stake.

    Hoping that I'll find some kindred spirits here -- or at least that I won't be swarmed with people telling me that I'm doing it wrong and they hope that I overeat, get my lupus back, and die. It's been nasty over there on the official website.

    Personal info: married, no kids, cat and dog are nursing home visitation animals. DH was laid off from his job at age 55, and graduated from college a year later with a degree in medical office management. He's also part-time missionary, managing a nonprofit assisting an isolated village in the Philippines.

    Kathleen

  2. #2

    Default Re: Finally I've found you!

    Hi Kathleen, welcome! You have a very interesting story and I am glad that you and your MD have found something that is working well for you. I don't generally go on the WW official board either. When I belonged here before my "home" was Delta Force. I really liked that forum because all of the members were so serious. (Certainly not to say that the other forums aren't serious too.) When I went to WW meetings before, I used to get discouraged by the members who would say "I really blew it.....I ate....Ha Ha Ha" That was why Bootcamp Buddies was so important to me. It was because of the seriousness. I'm just back again this week having restarted WW and my meeting on Wednesday so I think I need to make a certain number of posts before I can earn the right to post on Delta Force again. I'm 60, DH and I are retired and my 2 kids are grown. We live in Orange County with our 15 year old very set-in-her-ways cat. I hope to "see" you often at Bootcamp Buddies.
    Last edited by OCGirl; 09-30-2013 at 09:32 PM.
    Marianne





  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2013
    Location
    PA "Dutch Country"
    Replies
    21
    Blog Entries
    3

    Default Re: Finally I've found you!

    Marianne, thanks for your warm welcome. Delta Force sounds like the place for me, and let's keep talking until we earn the right to post there!

    I had a great experience at a WW meeting today. I work for a regional health care chaplaincy service, and I had an overnight call on Sunday night. Then the memorial service had to be scheduled for Tuesday, when I normally weigh in. So I got online and found a WW meeting near the facility where I'd been overnight. I knew that my weigh-in was going to be disastrous, because I'm fighting off a cold, I hadn't slept since Saturday, and I could barely fit into my shoes (which is my best indication that I'm folding on to fluids).

    So I went to this distant WW meeting, and posted a small gain. When the weigher inquired, I explained that I have an autoimmune disease which can cause huge fluctuations in my weight due to fluid retention, that I'd had some extra anti-inflammatories so that I could function throughout the night, that I'd been crying a little (which also makes me have a histamine reaction), and I affirmed that I'd been OP all week. I then cheerfully offered her my tracker book.

    She burst into laughter and said that if I was volunteering to let her read my tracker, there was probably nothing bad in there, so she'd take my word for it!

    The meeting was better organized and the leader was more assertive than I'm used to. My local meeting (which was cancelled recently for lack of interest) had been a mess, with the leader periodically being suspended due to weight gain, with people eating fried chicken dinners during the meeting (it's next to a KFC), and with the leader often refusing to let me speak because "you make people feel bad". I've been weighing in at another meeting on Tuesdays near my gym, but not staying for the meeting because it was so bad.

    I had a real epiphany when the September Routine as "know what you're eating for lunch, and two weekly topics in a row were downright offensive: "Should I track on weekends?" and "Getting back on track after Labor Day".

    I finally blew up on the WW message boards: WW and its leaders are setting their expectations too low. Pre-planning and tracking meals should be obvious, as should be staying OP (on the plan) every day of the week and every season of the year!

    And holey moley, the response was vicious, including a literal death threat -- "If you come to my meeting, I'll take you out back and kill you!" And there it was, my moment of clarity: most WW members don't really want to do anything to succeed, and most WW staffers (and corporate WW itself) are happy to play along with them and pocket their money. WW is the most well-researched food plan in the world, but the company doesn't really want us to succeed permanently. How weird is that?

    (continued in next message)

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2013
    Location
    PA "Dutch Country"
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    Default Re: Finally I've found you!

    So after the meeting today, I was heading out the door for the long drive home, but the leader stopped me. I'd been my usual verbose self whenever she'd asked a question, and while I'd been glad that she had a former hand than my other leaders, I figured that I'd never see her again.

    To my surprise, she told me that she's restarting my old meeting with a different batch of staffers, and since the weigher had told her where I was from, she wanted to enlist my support and help. We spent awhile afterward, drinking tea (this place is next to Boston Chicken -- what's ip with that?) and talking about our experiences. It turns out that this leader has been at goal weight for decades, after losing 100 pounds, and she's just as frustrated by the local WW structure as I am. I told her that I'd contact the pastor of the church and get myself a key, then we exchanged addresses and she got online to restart and promote the meeting.

    I drove home totally boggled and delighted. I cried on the way home, this time from relief and hope.

    I thought back to my first WW meeting; I'd actually joined and picked up my program materials at a mall WW storefront, where the clerk had no time to train me and there was no meeting scheduled that day. So I had been OP for nine glorious days when I went to my first meeting. I was down six pounds, my lupus was going into remission, and being on a structured food plan was giving me such confidence and emotional freedom. You can guess what happened next.

    I drove home from that meeting, fighting away tears and talking to my husband by speakerphone (he was overseas at the time). How was I supposed to hang on to the program, if even the staffers didn't follow the plan regularly?

    At that meeting, nobody celebrated milestones because "it would hurt the feelings of the people who aren't so lucky." Lucky? With my age, health issues, and heavy medication regimen, luck had absolutely nothing to do with it. I got my 10% keychain, 25-pound charm, and 16-week charm at another out-of-town meeting after I'd already surpassed each goal significantly, just because my regular meetings didn't keep them in stock. They don't even give "bravo" stickers, except for the two boxes in the front of your booklet to show that you attended "Routines and Spaces".

    So I am so grateful for today's meeting, and for being here on Bootcamp Buddies.

    Kathleen

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jun 2013
    Location
    PA "Dutch Country"
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    Default Re: Finally I've found you!

    I meant to write "firmer hand", not former, LOL. At least I can get another notch on my posting belt by correcting the error.

  6. #6

    Default Re: Finally I've found you!

    I hear you. The leaders at meetings are really important as they set the tone for everything. I have been lucky in having met a couple of great leaders in my time. They have been so inspirational.
    Marianne





  7. #7
    Join Date
    Sep 2001
    Location
    Southeastern, PA
    Replies
    160

    Default Re: Finally I've found you!

    I haven't posted here in what seems like ages, but had to come out of lurkdom to say congrats to a fellow PA dutch countrier! YOU have just given me the determination to get myself together and get back on a plan that I know works! thank you! I'll try to stop lurking and post more!

    Kim
    Restart 02/25/2012 at 268

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