Too good not to share...

[crazykid28]

Tonight, I watched a video with 49 of my sorority sisters about "Tapping Into Your True Potential." The video was just of a man lecturing, but the things that he said were so gut-wrenchingly close to home that I had to share.

The first thing that he talked about was how his mission as a public speaker was to "Comfort the disturbed and disturb the comfortable." How many times in our life do we get overwhelmed and just need someone there to comfort us? But, what appreciation would we have for the sunshine if it wasn't for the rain? Therefore, we don't need to be comfortable. Life is not about being "comfortable." Sure, I can be 55 pounds overweight and be "comfortable." But do we really want to live our lives like that?

The next thing that he talked about was a continuum between ego and self-esteem, drawn like this:

Ego l----------------------------------------l Self-esteem

He went on to explain that we have a horrible perception of the definitions of these two words. They are NOT the same.

Your ego is very fragile. When someone says, "Wow! You look like you've lost weight," that's not boosting our self-esteem. It's boosting our ego.

On the other hand, self-esteem is solid as a rock. Sure, it's a lot harder to attain than an ego. But why is that? Self-esteem is a YOU thing. It's not about what anyone says about you. It's about what you think about yourself, what you see in the mirror, and how you talk to yourself.

He then went on to correct his previous drawing of the line. He put ego on the bottom and drew a 45 degree line up to self-esteem (on top). It is so easy for us to fall down that slippery slope from self-esteem to ego. We look in the mirror and don't like what we see. I can't even count the number of days that I've woken up and said "Wow! Look at you. Your face is broken out. You've gained weight. Your legs look fat. Your love-handles are bigger. You have so many stretch marks. Look at that awkward under-arm fat that you have. Gosh, you're so ugly." I then feel like complete crap for the rest of the day.

Self-talk plays a HUGE part in our level of self-esteem. This speaker went on to say this, which was the most profound thing that I have heard in a while:

"If someone talked to me the way I talk to myself, I'd have no choice but to shoot them."

What would you do if you had a best friend that was with you 24/7 that nagged at you about how ugly and fat you were? YOU'D SEVER THAT FRIENDSHIP.

So why do we talk to ourselves in a way that we would not let other people talk to us?

Well, the time to change is now. I'm not saying that you have to wake up in the morning and feel all gooey inside because you're so pleased with yourself, but make it a routine to say "good morning, beautiful" or write on your bathroom mirror, "No matter what happens, I will always love myself."

We should all make a commitment to ourselves to not only treat others how we would like to be treated, but to treat ourselves the way that we would like others to treat us.

It is now the time to stop saying "I'll try." There is no "I'll try." You either do or you don't. Eliminate these words from your vocabulary: can't, try, and should. "I should be able to make it." "I can't lose these last 5 pounds." "I'll try to exercise twice a week." NO! You either will or you won't. Take the initiative and make a decision. You'll be much better off for it.

[crazykid28]

Bump for something that all of us need to read .

[Mary24]

Thanks for sharing! It sounds like a good speaker!

[plcm111195]

Excellent post! Thanks so much for sharing.

[BlzMaxGnrCCJkMly]

very cool thanks for posting it!

[crazykid28]

You're welcome .

[QueenBee2]

wow Crazy....you must be talking to me~those were the exact words that I used this morning.....Fat and Ugly.

That's a habit I'm trying to break~

[crazykid28]

wow Crazy....you must be talking to me~those were the exact words that I used this morning.....Fat and Ugly.

That's a habit I'm trying to break~

Me too. It's hard for me not to be down on myself when I'm running on the Elliptical at the gym and the mirrors are right there...and that's when I need self-esteem the most!

We just have to remember that who we are is not a size, a weight, or what someone else thinks of us. It is our own opinion of ourselves.

Like I said, start small. I occasionally leave myself Post-It notes in random places with the (few, but it's growing) things that I like about myself.

[mrss]

Cynthia, good post! I like the points on ego versus self-esteem.